When Hello Is Also Goodbye

just me

On May 23rd I had an appointment with my OBGYN because I thought I was leaking fluid. It turned out that I was, and I was dilated to 4cm at exactly 20 weeks. I was sent to the hospital and told I would most likely go into labor within the next 3-5 days, but I didn't. I was able to go home but what put on strict bed rest to hopefully get my baby boy to stay in there until at least 24 weeks. At 21 weeks I had an ultrasound, my anatomy scan and to check how much fluid was around my baby, everything looked great there was plenty of fluid, baby was absolutely perfect, and my cervix had even closed a centimeter. My Dr was so happy with the results, he even said if things keep going like they had that week we could possibly go to 37 weeks. Then on June 4th I was really uncomfortable all day, and now I believe I was having small contractions on and off all day, I just didn't realize with it being my first pregnancy. Around 10pm I started hurting and I could feel my stomach getting tight, but I didn't want to believe it they already told me they wouldn't do anything to stop my labor if I went into labor. At about 11:30 they started hurting more and so I told my boyfriend that I thought I was having contractions. So we went to they hospital. I labored for 12 hours to give birth to a baby I knew had no chance of surviving. At 10:05AM my little Clint Daniel Kenney was born and he was only with a for a few short moments before he went to heaven. We got pictures

with him and of him. He was perfect, he was going to look just like his daddy, already had his nose and lips. Then we had to say goodbye to our perfect little 1 lb 11in baby boy.