Rewind oct 2016. Four months after we got married. I wish I could slap myself looking back. We figured a few rounds and trying we would have a positive results. After 11 years on the pill my body was wonky and had long cycles about 40 something days ( side note they are all good now at about 32). April 2017 my NP runs a semen test and ahhh 😱 bad. Certainly not my husband! Low is all aspects! We have to wait over three months to see a fertility urologist (mind you knowing something is terribly wrong but having to wait all summer to find out in brutal). August 2017 the verdict is in. Varicoceles. Big ones. And some borderline low testosterone. He starts clomid. November 2017. (Already a year of trying by then) they get surgically tired off! And you guess it more waiting to see how it and clomid worked! Another 3-6 month to see change. At this point friends keep passing me by. The amount of face to face interactions of hearing “guess what I’m pregnant” is soul crushing. We are good people together ten years. Why was this our fate and so simple and easy it feels for some of my other friends. So January 2018 count went up and so did motility and morphology! Doctor was impressed! Count got to a total 32 million so still semi low (they like over 40). He says for him to stay on clomid and we will do another test is April. April comes it’s 164 million total count along with fine motility and morphology. Finally this is what we are waiting for. I’ve been checked with my ob and seem to be fine. We always time sex with my pos opk. But unfortunately we only really started trying with a fair shot. My best friend told me she is pregnant after a few tries. This hurt my husband and I both as I think we had high hopes for this cycle. It was our two year anniversary and it would of been perfect but obviously too perfect and I start my period while on our beach trip. I pray sometime this year we get this miracle I’ve waited for. My husband has sacrificed so much to help us create a family and I’m ready for this stage of life to end so we can move on. One day I hope to share our story in a blog. Close friends and family know but I think others will be shocked. I have been asked things like do you want kids or you need a baby for that remodeled home of yours now! I’m sure people are curious as to why not. Unfortunately we were 1 in 8 but now with all in working order I hope to get the fair chance at natural conception. I know my pregnancy announced to friends and family will be the sweetest and most exciting. If you read all this thank you. Trying to take it cycle by cycle and if nothing by end of the year we will give into more help.....