Severe pregnancy depression, baby daddy left

I already have a 14 month old, and I’m 10 weeks pregnant with the same guy. He left out of nowhere and wants nothing to do with me. He claims he’ll help and be supportive, but whenever i need help he ignores me. I have a heart condition that’s worsening now that I’m pregnant making my heart too weak, high blood pressure already and have been hospitalized multiple times due to dehydration during this pregnancy because i have hypermesis. On top of that, I’m a full time college student. He won’t pay for me to get an abortion, but he said he wants nothing to do with me. Saturday he told me he was going to try to work things out with me and he came over and fed my son, and as soon as i hopped in the shower he left my son here and left and ignored me. He texted me and said he lied and doesn’t want to be with me but he’ll help with our 1 year old, he knew i needed help i was in pain and as soon as i asked him for it he ignored me and hasn’t talked to me since. I wake up everyday wanting to die. I wake up multiple times a night from anxiety and the first thing i think is i don’t want to be here anymore. Waking up is so painful to me, i get upset when my son cries and wakes me up at this point and i know i shouldn’t. I hate him for doing this to me. He’s been gone a month and before he left he told me he loved me and wanted to marry me, now he says he wants nothing to do with me and it was all a lie. He said being a man doesn’t mean he has to be with me. He’s also told me he doesn’t have to deal with this baby because he isn’t legally obligated to. I just feel like i can’t handle this anymore