Pregnant and (recently) single


Hi everyone! Guess I'm reaching out for support.

My baby's dad and I haven't had the longest of relationships but it was beautiful and strong - at least at first. He was happy with the idea of having his first child (he said i'm the first one with whom he'd actually considered this) but when it did happen things started to fall apart quite fast. He searched for an endless number of reasons for arguing that our bond was not strong enough anymore and that we're fighting constantly. The truth is - what minor fights we did have earlier in the relationship, we had managed to resolve long ago and after that we were stronger than ever - or so I thought. Now he's saying it's my fault that he feels bad each time we communicate and that it doesn't seem as though this can work.

Maybe I've had the wrong experience with past relationships but it doesn't seem that big of a problem to me - at least nothing that can't be worked through if one really wants. I think the problem is that he just doesn't want it to get better and is too spineless to admit it. After waiting for several weeks for him to make his decision I couldn't stand it any longer and asked for an answer yesterday. At first he suggested I wait even longer - even though I said I'm already living each day in constant fear of being left with our unborn child at any moment. Then he suggested an abortion because 'it would cause less problems for him'. And finally he admited he wants to break up.

As hysterical as I felt that moment, I realize I have to live on without him even if I still have so much love for my baby's dad. I guess what I'm looking for is suggestions with what to do next. In spite of leaving us both he said he would still be willing to offer help with the pregnancy. Being so broken up - should I accept and what kind of help? This is my first pregnancy and it's all very new to me. I have a loving family and friends that will be with me all the way through so maybe it's better to cut all the strings with the dad? Should I plan on having him at the delivery? What if he suddenly changes his mind? I don't think I can trust a person that is so unstable in his decisions.

What's your experience with being left mid-pregnancy?