Second chance

I want to start off with some background on my mental health. I’ve had sever depression and anxiety since 7th grade, the same time i began to self harm. My parents did not know until right before my freshman year because a friend of mine had been self harming and her parents found out. They contacted my mom and wanted her to check on me and see if I was doing the same.

On January 25, 2018 I was admitted to Queens Medical Center because of a pill overdose two nights prior. I had reached my rock bottom. My breaking point. I felt as though there was nothing left for me in life. I messaged a few people with a simple text, “I love you and I’m sorry.” I then proceeded to take over 20 pills and waited to die. I was finished, beaten. A great friend of mine had been thrown off by my message and got into contact with my parents, because she was worried about my safety. When my parents had found me just sitting in the bathroom, they had my rushed to Wahiawa General Hospital where i was given two I.V’s and threw up everything in my stomach. My heart rate was changing rapidly and I almost had a seizure. My was burned for two weeks after due to the puking. When my vitals returned to normal I was sent to Queens for further treatment. I had only been there a few days but I learned a lot more then expected. I learned that my life was worth living. That I could not stop. I deserved to thrive and have a future life of my own. I truly do believe that I had been given a second chance surviving my suicide attempt. And I’m sharing this because, well because I feel like I should be able to share it. Suicide is honestly something that needs to be talked about and joking about it should not be in anyone’s mind.Recovery from this has not been easy, but it will be worth it. I thank God for my second chance and I’m not going to take it for granted.