My boyfriend is amazing but I don’t think I want to have his baby that I’m carrying. I’m only 5 weeks today and I feel so torn.

Two weeks ago my sons father told me that he wanted us to be a family again. We were together for 7 years and split the last 2 years. I’ve never loved another man as much as him. He is my soulmate and my best friend.

I literally found out I was pregnant the day I was going to break up with my boyfriend. I told my sons father and he is devastated. But he still wants to move forward with us minus the pregnancy.

I don’t know what to do. I love my boyfriend. I don’t know how I can take away his opportunity of being a father...I feel selfish for even having these thoughts. He’d be a great father. I wonder if our baby will have his cute walk. Who will he/she look like? What impact will they have on this world...the people around them?

How can I kill the future of the life growing inside of me...only to go and start another future with another man?

I would love to continue raising my son with his father. We wouldn’t have to deal with crazy visitation days. We’d all wake up together everyday. But what about my boyfriend? He’d be left with nothing and no one.

I don’t even know why I am contemplating abortion to go back to an old relationship. I’m sure I will have a happy life with my boyfriend and our child. But, I will always feel sorry for not giving my son the chance to grow up with his father and I...as a family. He’s been begging since we split for me to be with his dad again. 😩

I’m just so lost and torn. Why couldn’t he have fought for us 2 years ago? Why did he wait until someone else finally loved me to realize I was the one??