I feel miserable šŸ˜­ Update

Gem

Iā€™m constantly exhausted, my mouth tastes terrible and I feel sick constantly, night time cramps are terrifying and I want to cry all the time.

Iā€™m not very far along and this is my first pregnancy. My partner and I have wanted this for a long time but all of a sudden Iā€™m struck by the enormity of everything and Iā€™m not coping very well.

I feel like Iā€™m letting him down all the time and heā€™s having to pick up the slack. Heā€™s so happy and calm and I guess it helps that heā€™s older than me and has been through all this before (he has a daughter who is now 16 but sadly doesnā€™t get to see her any more because his ex wife is difficult).

I was referred to hospital yesterday after really bad pain because my doctor suspected ectopic pregnancy. They did a scan and baby is in the right place and we even saw a heartbeat. He was so emotional he cried. I did too.

I donā€™t know. The best thing has happened to us and I canā€™t bear to be alone with my thoughts. Iā€™m sorry, this is such a confused ramble but Iā€™m so mixed up and confused and I know my hormones are raging but that doesnā€™t make it any easier. I want to tell my Mum and Dad because I feel so lonely but my partner wants to wait til the 12 week scan as heā€™s pretty traditional. I have no idea how to make it through the next six weeks.

UPDATE

Iā€™ve talked to my partner about all the really positive reasons for talking to my parents and how I need support and how it would be nice to actually celebrate (because we really havenā€™t yet). He says he canā€™t tell me why he doesnā€™t want to tell people, he just doesnā€™t. And I need to keep doing things instead of resting when Iā€™m tired because Iā€™m ā€œgiving in to itā€. Iā€™m so frustrated right now.