Terrible day (some triggering topics)

Ugh ladies today’s been really hard for me... first I was puking at the mall for who knows why, then I get back to my house and got a call from my buddy telling me something was up with his mom and he wanted me and my fiancée to check on her... this is where it may get triggering for some so please be advised it’s kinda graphic....

We get to my friends moms apartment and I’m banging on the door because nobody has heard from her all day which is odd. So I’m banging on the door yelling heather you home?! I don’t hear the TV, the door is locked but her car is there so maybe she went to the studio (she’s an artist) a few mins go by and her nephew gets there and he has a key and runs in and back out in a matter of two minutes. This is where it get graphic and upsetting... I yell to him is she ok? And his next words stabbed me in the heart. He yelled “No She’s dead!” And me and my fiancée run over to the door and my fiancée comforts her nephew and I ran inside and what I saw destroyed me. . . I ran into her bedroom and she was laying on her bed with her pill bottles around her. I started to shake her and smacked her a few times knowing that she wasn’t sleeping because she was ice cold and you could just smell death in the apartment. It was something I didn’t wanna tell my buddy but I had to. The simple phrase I could manage to type was “she’s gone Wes...”

He replied hmmmm because he didn’t understand he thought she wasn’t home... he was on his way to her house as I start telling him to put his hazards on and speed to her apartment. Next thing I know there’s four cop cars because her nephew called 911. After the first car arrived they looked at him saw he was hysterical and then looked at me and asked me to go and show him where she was. So I had to go back in the apartment for a second time. My heart kept aching more and more and as soon as Wes got there (heathers son) I ran up to him gave him a hug and told him I was sorry for his loss. The paramedics already came and left after pronouncing her deceased. The cops and detectives kept asking about her history and health. She was recovering from cancer and had severe depression. They determined it was a suicide. And coming from someone who’s been so low that they have attempted suicide it destroyed me... I had to leave the premises and go home because I couldn’t handle the energy I was feeling. I just wish she reached out for help I wish she didn’t have to go that way. She was such an amazing person shit she still is and always will be. We had our ups and downs but I loved her like a family member. All that matters now is that she’s no longer suffering, no longer in pain wether it be physical or emotional. It will be hard for the family but with support I know they can get through this. They’re very strong people and very caring. I just really hope if anyone who has read this and has felt suicidal or is contemplating suicide that they reach out and get the help before it’s too late. Before someone else goes through what I just went through. I don’t care if I know you or not you are loved, you are important, and you are on this earth for a reason 💕 I love all of you.