Ok my SO drinks beer every night. At least 6 cans of beer with i think 4.5% alcohol in them. He never gets drunk because hes body has build up a tolerance for it. He works mostly everyday doing his own landscaping business. He for sure works at least 40 hours a week & makes enough so im able to be a stay at home mom for his kiddo who we have full custody of. I would honestly compare his drinking to someone smoking cigarettes every day. But it honestly kills me inside to see hime do it. I think its mostly because of my past with alcohol, ive seen a lot of bad because of it. Fighting & cancer of the liver & death.

So im very torn...

Part of me says he works hard in the hot & cold weather outside for us, he supports us & his personality never changes when he drinks

Other part says he is killing himself slowly, he is wasting at least $20 a week & my past experiences make me scared & then my jealous part of me say why dont i get to spend $20 a week on myself. I know thats terrible but it how i feel.

What would you think if you were in my spot?

I have tried talking to him about all of this but he just gets mad. He says he doesnt have a problem & list all that he does for us. He doesn't understand my anxiety about people drinking. And honestly he says i can spend $20 a week but im the one that cant bring myself to spend $20 a week on myself because i dont want to waste it and i know by the end of the month that would add up to a lot of freaking money.

Thanks to anyone that reads. I just really need to vent.