Parasite Mother-in-Law (long rant)

I am so sick of my mother-in-law asking for money. She has caused arguments in the past between me and my husband over this issue. She can't afford her lifestyle (because she has a live in boyfriend that hasn't worked in years who she also supports) and she refuses move out of her rent house and downsize to an apartment she can afford. She is always short on cash but refuses to make changes to help her situation. To top it off she just purchased a new vehicle (that she can't afford) and now she is even more financially crippled. I've told my husband it upsets me when she asks us for money. For a while he did not give her any money because he knew it would upset me but he's starting to do it again. She'll ask for money for food or medicine but this is only after she has spent her own money on unnecessary things like cable, cellphones, eating out,etc. He'll ask me if its okay knowing it upsets me but I feel like he's trying to make me the bad guy by saying no she needs to starve or be sick. Plus he's the bread winner in our house and I stay home with our daughter so technically he makes all the money. Therefore I begrudgingly always say okay. If she would do things to help herself I wouldn't mind helping her out occasionally but she doesn't want to make any changes to help herself so I feel like why should we help her. It's getting to the point that I really really resent her. We have the only grandchild she has (my husband is an only child) and she never makes time to spend with her or come down to visit. She always expects us to make the two hour drive to her house so she can see our daughter. She finds a way to do everything else she wants but cannot seem to find the time to come visit her only grandchild. She thinks I don't know about the money and she's doing it behind my back which is even more upsetting. I am ready to write her off! Am I wrong for resenting her? Should I be okay with the money borrowing? Its not like were are rolling in dough. We struggle with bills, we have extra expenses due to our daughter having special needs, but we budget month to month to get by. She never pays us back or even asks if we have the means to keep giving her funds. I want to confront her and tell her not to ever ask again because she's not our responsibility. Should I?