Depression and Pregnacy

Anyone else deal with excruciating depression through pregnancy? I have always struggled through chronic depression, but when I got pregnant it steadily got worse. My first midwife refused to treat me, and now that we've moved to a new state I'm hoping to get on some meds with my new midwife that I'll be seeing next week. I'm 32 weeks tomorrow and depression has gotten so bad I am starting to have episodes of psychosis. It's so bad I have literally no will to live. This is my husband and I's first child and I had a low chance of having a baby and always wanted to, but now I feel this extreme existential dread. I am absolutely terrified of labor and terrified of raising a child and all I can think of is that I can't do it. I don't know what to do and I feel crazy and I just am falling apart.....

I am struggling so so bad. I literally have lost all will to live.....and I'm so scared