Help please! I know this sounds odd but I worry my boyfriend is too selfless! I love him. He is my angel, but he is a people-pleaser to a fault. He's not as extreme as he used to be. He used to go above and beyond for people and would end up feeling miserable at the end. Even though he is much better now, he still needs to work on it and I don't know how to help.

I think it is sweet that he is like that, but I hate that he forgets about his feelings when he is trying to make others happy. I want him to focus on his health and happiness, but I feel that he only really does that when I'm with him.

He's aware that this happens and wants to work on it, but doesn't realize it until it is too late. What he tells me is that basically someone will ask him for help or something like that and if he knows he is capable of doing it, he feels obligated to, as in he would feel awful if he did not. But sometimes it ends up leaving him unhappy anyway. (For example, if a coworker asks him to stay a few hours later to cover his shift he will say yes because he has no other real plans, but will be sad and frustrated that it's kept him from me longer). The thing is, the realization that it bothers him doesn't come until after. Until then, he is just eager to please because, honestly, he is just such a sweetheart.

Has anyone had an experience like this? I care about him too much to watch him do this to himself constantly. How can I help remind him to take a second to think about himself!?