He disgusts me .

Okay so I been married for 3.5 years & have 2 baby girls.

My marriage was really good in the beginning .

Then he started doing shit that lil boys do ( texting girls, sex talks, sending/asking nasty pics, having double social media accounts so I don’t find out, signing up on dating apps )

Ever since that I don’t trust him at all.

He’s done this 3-4 times ( that I know of ) already and my gut feeling tells me he still does .

Lately everythingg he does irritates me and makes me sick

Like he doesn’t give a fuck about his kids. I would be handling one child and the other would be screaming her lungs out crying and he just lets her. He lays there on his phone and watches her cry.

All he does is lay there and smoke his vape and scratch his balls. Like no lie, his band is on his balls every 2 mins , like that’s disgusting man .

You have a almost 2 year old and she sees everything .

I don’t even wanna lay next to him

I don’t wanna see his face

I don’t wanna hug him

I don’t even wanna talk to him

I don’t know but I feel like all my feelings for him are gone .

And all I can think is ... where will I go if I leave him... I have no job, I have no house, where will I go. 😢