Hardest thing i have ever gone through

Strap yourself in this is going to be a LONG post.

So My whole life i had told people my mom was my best friend but that has changed over the last three and a half years. I no longer even call her mom i call her By her first name (let’s call her C) because she isn’t worthy of being called mom.

I was a young mom had my daughter when i was 18, her bio dad was never in the picture so i did it on my own. Around the time my daughter was about to turn 5 i was going through a difficult time in life. I didn’t like where I was mentally and also i wanted to provide a better life for my daughter. I spoke to C about it and she offered to take my daughter and help me while i got my feet on the ground. I was so appreciative of what she was doing for me. Over the next few years I moved, started working full time and going to school full time to support myself while i was in school. During this time i would see my daughter several times a week. I would go over to C’s house and just hang out, pick my daughter up from school the days i had off work and do homework with her until C got off work and came home. I would even cook dinner so we could all sit down and have a family dinner. After working full time and going to school i started to get on the track i wanted in life. I had also been in a relationship for many years with a guy who then proposed to me, and proposed to my daughter who said he wanted to be her Dad. We got married and bought a house. After buying the house I started taking my daughter 50/50 with C. My husband was working as an engineer and told me to stop working so i could focus on my daughter and school full time since he was making good money. I went to C and told her i was ready to take my daughter full time and would like to file to end the guardianship ( we had been talking about ending the guardianship after I got married and moved into the new house where My daughter would have her own room) I didn’t want to overstep or not be sensitive to the fact that C and my daughter could be attached and offered to go to joint therapy with C to make sure it was a smooth transition and that everyone was happy. For several months we went to therapy, C would bring up an issue she was concerned about and I would address it. She would bring up another thing she was concerned about and I would address it. This happened for over 6 months where she would bring something up I address it and/or the therapist would say it’s something that isn’t even a concern. After this 6+ months i realized that she would never be happy with anything i did and that she would never agree to ending the guardianship. I also brought up with C that i thought her husband had to do with her rigid stance (because he is manipulative and mentally abusive), and that they were acting like they wanted to keep my daughter until she was 18. C denied him having anything to do her not wanting to end the guardianship and that they just wanted her one more year so she could finish 5th grade with her friends at the school by her house bc with me she would attend a different school. I decided to bite the bullet and file to end the guardianship. We went to court and the judge asked us to go to mediation. We went for 3 hours and got no where just like in therapy. We went back to court and the judge couldn’t make a decision so he appointed minors counsel and sent it to trial 🙄. C and I had been representing ourselves until one day i get a letter saying they hired an attorney. I called my daughters lawyer (who had seen C’s husbands manipulative character and was favorable to me having my daughter back) and she recommended someone she knows to represent me. We went to trial, C tried to ask for new minors counsel bc she thought she didn’t do a good enough investigation (like going to my daughters school and talking to her teachers 😑) the judge denied it and proceeded with the trial. In mediation C’s husband had mentioned how he thought i was lying about being in school and how he thought my husband didn’t make enough money to support me and my daughter. So in trial i provided evidence such as my school transcript to show i was in school and the dental program i was working towards, also i provided my husbands W2 to show he made good money, and even showed that my daughter had medical/dental/vision insurance through my husbands union. After i went up on the stand C went up and said i had been an absent mother that i only came around because she made me, said that she just wanted my daughter to have fun in life and that our house was too strict, and said she intended to keep my daughter until she was 18. When she said she wanted to keep her i swear the entire room turned to look at me to see my reaction, it was like something out of a movie. I already knew that’s what she wanted bc of her actions over the last year, but she denied denied denied that’s what she intended. The judge ruled to end the guardianship but said bc of the bond my daughter and C had that he wanted a visitation order and for us to negotiate the order ourselves or he would do it himself. C’s lawyer sent over a proposed visitation order that said they wanted my daughter EVERY weekend, EVERY major holiday, and all summer break. I offered every other weekend which they replied back with me having her one weekend a month and they get the rest of the weekends. I said no let the judge decide then. He ordered the first and third weekend of the month and two weeks during summer. After this you would think it’s over right? WRONG! C and her husband started telling my daughter during their visitation that we were selfish for taking her away and we didn’t care about her that we didn’t make sacrifices to go live in the city they live in because it’s a prominent area and we live in the “ghetto”. They started saying we were bad parents that made bad decisions and they were going to go back and file for guardianship again bc she belonged with them. I tried to talk to C several times beg her to work with me bc it was over court was done and to please keep your opinions to yourself and not say them in front of my daughter or i would be forced to go back to court to end the visitation but they never did. Then we started having more problems where they gave my daughter an iPod Touch that had no parental controls on it and she was on Instagram and Snapchat and musical.ly posting inappropriate videos and pictures of herself. We had been having behavioral problems with my daughter for many years and in my house everything has parental locks and passwords for these reasons. When i brought these issues up to C she brushed it off saying she didn’t know my daughter was doing that stuff so i told her to take all electronics devices away from my daughter. They never did just kept giving it back. Eventually my daughter snuck the iPod fromC’s house to my house and when i found it i told C i was keeping it and showed her all the new inappropriate content on it which included her talking to a 14 year old boy on messenger inappropriately while she was 11. After that they went and bought her a cell phone that she is only allowed to use at their house!!! I was constantly finding Snapchat Instagram and musical.ly accounts i would have to get deleted through customer support and taking screenshots to send to C and also for evidence so i could go back to court and end the visitation. It’s so toxic for my daughter to go there and have no rules or boundaries and to hear them spew all these hateful comments about my husband and I. My daughter is seeing a therapist who is trying to work with her on knowing what she’s doing is wrong and acting out and to take responsibility and not be impulsive, she is 12 though so she is still a child and struggles with going between two opposite environments. Just last month i found an Instagram account where she took photos of herself in a bra and short shorts over at C’s house with the iPhone. C said it was my fault bc i bought the bra for her and it was inappropriate for a 12 year old, i bought it in the girls section at target. My daughter is starting to see the manipulation and the bribing from them to get her to keep wanting to go there but she has a strained relationship with C now bc when her husband is emotionally abusive to my daughter C stands up for her husband and not my daughter. I am currently in the process of going back to court, the judge ordered minors counsel the same one she had last time and we have another court date. C and her husband have stooped to new lows this time around, within hours of my lawyer serving C the paperwork to go back to court C and her husband went to CPS and told them my husband beats my daughter, they also showed up to my house with a police escort and forced my daughter to go after my daughter told C she wanted to skip visitation that weekend bc she was uncomfortable at her house bc of C and her husband. I truly don’t know what happened, it was like one day a switch was flipped and they treated us like we are horrible people. All of this has effected my marriage, my mental and physical well being, and has damaged my relationship with C beyond repair and is on the road of damaging my daughters relationship with her, as well as putting my daughters mental well being at risk in so many ways. I think about this all day every day. I’ve cried so many tears and lost sleep so many nights racking my brain with what went wrong. All i tried to do was show appreciation for C’s help when i needed it the most and to start being the best mom i could be to my daughter. I am exhausted and don’t know how much more i can take because even after all i have gone through with C and her husband i have never been rude or disrespectful, i have never yelled or cussed at them. Many sane people would have lost their shit a long time ago but i never wanted to stoop to their level i always wanted to be the bigger person.