Flashbacks

Valerie
I'm home from the hospital now. I had to go in this morning as I could not manage my bleeding. It was just gushing. I filled the bottom of the tub twice. The toilet four or five times. Three maxi pads. All within 3 hours. I had a manual vacuum to stop the gushing. I'm now bleeding normally, like a period. I'm in much less pain. 
I am trying to nap, but every time I close my eyes, all I can see is images of red. The fetus' hands. The bathtub filled. The enormous clots. The ceiling spinning during the procedure.