Hi everyone, this is going to be long so thanks to everyone who reads and responds. I feel that first off I should explain that I am mostly vanilla so I hope no one feels that I am intruding on this group. I know a couple people in the kink lifestyle and have noticed that communication is a key component and that is one of the things I want to work on.

I am married for 8 years we have a 3 year old after fertility treatments and several losses. We are trying for another for about a year and half but can't afford treatments again.

We are really stuck in a rut in both our sex life and day to day life. The fertility issues have had a negative effect on both of our sex drives. He has been out of work for over a year now and is dealing with depression so he is kind of shuts down and plays video games a lot. He is looking for full time job but no luck so far.

I am the income provider and I am ok with that, I have been the main income provider in previous relationships as well. But right now I am also doing a majority of the house hold work and child care. We are already working on that part. I am a special needs preschool teacher and babysit on the side so I am a caregiver at work and at home. Plus I feel like a caregiver for my husband too. I really want change that dynamic especially in the bedroom.

I think I would really like to incorporate him dominating me a little. And him taking on more of a caregiver/protective role as well. Not really sure how to bring this up. I don't know how to ask for what I want sexually, I just feel embarrassed and awkward. But the idea of him showing that he wants me by being more dominant and protective is a turn on. I think it would be a great role reversal from the rest of my life.

I have one friend who writes a lot about being in a dd/lg relationship. I don't think that is for me but some parts of that sound appealing to me.