🆘 Opinions please!! 🆘
I really really need your opinions!
So, growing up, my dad was always verbally abusive. He would never hit my mom and I, but he would punch holes in walls, throw breakables, and verbally degrade us. He was frequently vicious, angry and mean. My mom never left. When I was 18 I moved out. As a result of my childhood, I had a lot of mental health issues. I've seen a therapist for years now.
One of the biggest takeaways from therapy is that....as an adult, I have the right to decide who I have in my life and in what capacity. This was the best advice I've ever received.
Ever since then, I've kept a distance from my family. They are still in my life. I see them twice a month for dinner. The only reason I do dinner with them is because I want to see my mom. She never left the marriage. It's easier for my overall mental health if I see them in small doses.
But for my dad this isn't enough. He's only met my husband once. He's never met my in laws or seen where I live. He says I'm being selfish for not letting them in to that part of my life.
I'm finally at the point where I'm happy, healthy, and not suicidal. I feel like he destroyed my mental health, and I'm finally me again. I feel like someone who has dealt with mental health issues, seeing them twice a month is enough.
I haven't cut them out completely. I still see them for holidays, birthdays, etc. Am I in the wrong? Any insight would be greatly appreciated.