In life we all have to make choices. In July, after 10 years with the father of my children I was driving home and finally made a decision. I decided that it was time for me to call it quits.

Why?

My children’s father had great qualities about him. He is gracious, funny, intelligent and articulate and for us Geminis that is a big deal. However, he had major character flaws that ultimately caused a lot of friction in the relationship. It came to the point where I realized that I was making all the compromises and changes to be who he wanted me to be and then I no longer recognized myself.

My Failures

Through this experience I realized that I also contributed to the failure of the relationship by not standing my ground. Five years ago I gave him and I another chance to make our relationship work. I failed to realize that I was giving the ideal the chance but the reality of it working was obvious. He didn’t change after our 1-year break up and most people don’t change. Since change is a lot of work that many people don’t have the fortitude to execute.

In conclusion, was I perfect?No, but I was valuable, loving and loyal. I write this to encourage other women to take a closer look at their relationships and to make sure that you and your partner share the same values. This way you both can avoid heartache and wasted time. Which is the most valuable thing because you only get one chance at life. I don’t regret my decision to reconcile.

In those years I have made much internal growth and gained tremendous strength and confidence within myself. I know where I stand so that I don’t fall. I’m a better example for my daughters and show them that knowledge of self is the key to becoming an emotionally balanced person.

I hope this message adds value to every women no matter where you are. Be decisive and always true to yourself.