I decided I need to do something for myself

CarrieH.

I need and want to lose weight! And I feel like if I post this here I will be more motivated to keep up with it. Growing up I was that girl everyone hated, size 00-0 in my teens and a 2 in my early 20s. So I never really thought I would get to this point...Now after having my daughter I have been in a size 12. Before I got pregnant a year and a half ago I weighed 130lbs. And as a 5’8” woman I was good with that. I knew I was almost “too skinny” before and after meeting my husband and getting married I had gained about 20lbs. And while I was pregnant I gained about 30lbs. So when I had my daughter I just thought I’d go back to 130lbs no problem...but months passed and nothing’s changed. My post baby clothes still didn’t fit. I have had to go buy bigger and bigger close instead. It is very depressing at times.

Like one evening we went out to dinner as a family and almost instantly I felt uncomfortable because my jeans were too tight around my stomach. I guess the look on my face showed it too cause my husband asked me what was wrong. I ended up going to the bathroom and unbuttoning and unzipping my pants, thankfully my shirt was long and loose so it wasn’t noticeable. It was embarrassing!🙈

And I feel like I can’t say how I feel or just complain a lil bit to anyone. I hate when I say “im fat” or “I need to lose weight” to someone and they just blow it off and say “oh no, your not as big as me!” Or “no you looks better than I do” all that goes though my head is ‘wait when did the subject or the conversation go from me to you?!’ The way I feel about myself is not based on you and how you look! I am not you so if I want/need to lose weight that is for me to decide. Stop trying to make yourself feel better or whatever you are trying to do when you try to belittle how I feel about my body. Everyone can improve something about themselves and it’s never going to be the same as someone else. (Sorry went on a rant 😤)

Every once in a while I get upset and think I’m ugly. And my husband always tells me I’m beautiful and that he loves me but still I’m tired of feeling this way. And I know I could be healthier. Also my husband and I are TTC our second baby and I know being in better shape would help that a lot. So I wanted to post some pick of before so I can look back and see the later. Wish me luck and any pointers would be appreciated!

Going for a size 2 to a 12 in about 4 years is enough to make someone not too happy right?!

Me @ 21, 110lbs...before I met my husband

Me @ 25, 130lbs...after we got married.

The day I found out I was pregnant @ 26

Me @ 28 165lbs.(now)

Took these today