I’ve been with my partner for 3 years. The emotional, mental, and verbal abusive has been present for a good 2 1/2 of those years. He lies constantly about the littlest of things, he has cheated multiple times, name-calling, telling me he’d like to hit me, telling me to leave, cussing me like a dog; making me feel unwanted, unloved, worthless. He always had a way to make it all better though. He would fix his behavior just long enough to suck me back in basically. I also have a 18m old daughter with him which makes me want to fight harder to make the relationship work so that she doesn’t have to grow up in a broken family. Lately things have been only getting worse though. He has brake checked me (while our daughter is in the car) to get me to stop “bitching” as he calls it, he has shoved me when I stand in his way while trying to talk to him, he has thrown things, nothing has been too severe but things I know shouldn’t have ever happened to begin with. Today has been the worst of it all, i found out that he stole my diaper money out of my wallet and spent it on himself some cigarettes, we started arguing and he grabbed my wallet and started going through it and i tried taking it back from him (he is 6’6” and i’m 5’5”) i had my arms all wrapped around him to grab my wallet and when i did get it out of his hands he shoved me, i seen red and when i bounced back up from being shoved i swung and hit him (not in the face) and told him to never shove me again, he left and as he drove off he told me if i ever laid a hand on him again he would punch me in the face. After he got back about 5 hours later, i tried to ignore him, he came in and changed my tv channel so i nicely asked him to please let me finish my show and he told me no it was his tv so i could just watch whatever i was watching later. That started another arguement that led to him unplugging and taking the controllers (we use an xbox to watch our shows), i had bought the rechargeable batteries in the controller and told him i wanted them back and he said no and threw them in his car and then grabbed my wallet, i grabbed his xbox and told him i would give it back if he gave me my things, he then threw my wallet on the ground (open making everything scatter across the ground) and grabbed me by the back of my neck, hard enough that i couldn’t get out of his grip, he then wrapped his other arm around me and grabbed his xbox, i kept yelling at him to let me go and i couldn’t let go of the xbox without it falling to the ground, he picked me up into the air and it felt like he was trying to throw me to the ground but i kept catching myself with my feet, he finally let me go and i stumbled forward and he still had grasp of his xbox and he just got into his car and i tried to make it back into the house while trying to keep my daughter calm (she was standing on the porch) having a full on panic attack. i made it inside and fell to the floor bawling and trying to catch my breath while holding my daughter led and he stepped inside, through my wallet on the couch, and began yelling at me more about how i should have just gave him his things and how i shouldn’t have made such a big deal out of the money situation and none of this would have happened. So now i feel like he is right, like if i wouldn’t have started any of this then none of it would have happened, is it my fault?