How many years should it take till u neet ur boyfriends other kid?

Question

Been with my boyfriend 6 years meet his son 2 times both his kids live in California I was told I wasn't allowed to meet his daughter Cuz according to the mother there child would be traumatized if she meet me and he Rly not doing much bout it besides arguing over the phone with her bout it Idk what to do in bout to give up and tell him to just move out there and will go our own way but I love him alot

Answer

Honestly, unless they have some type of court ordered custody agreement that states something to the effect of prohibiting the child from exposure to anyone that's not a spouse of the other parent, she really has no control over who he chooses to introduce his child to, aside from him being respectful of her wishes and not doing it simply because she demands such. 
I'd have a problem with my SO catering to her unreasonable demands over choosing to allow me to have a part in his family and child's life. 
I'm curious, if you've been together for 6 years, how has he done his custody/visitation with that child so that he/she never met you? Does he go to his ex's home to visit that child, or not be around you at all when he has that child? I'm curious how that situation would work, and me personally, all the scenarios I can imagine, after 6 years with someone, I wouldn't be ok with any of them.

Answer

I met my bf's daughter like a week after we met because we were hanging out alot since we lived across the street from each other. She was a little baby at the time but we have been together 5 years. She has grown up knowing me to always be there with her dad. Her mother didnt really know about me til about 2 years in because daughter would talk about me. Sounds like mom is insecure. I would say if you guys have been together that long that it is safe for you to meet his kids and be around them if you guys are planning a future together. Its different if it was just hooking up and not serious but that is obviously not your case.

Answer

The mother obviously has some insecurities but she needs to think of her children instead of herself.

You're important to the father and as long as you are stable and a safe person to bring children around, I can't have a problem with it for my own selfish reasons.

When a parent feels like the person they are dating is going to be in their life for a long time, then that's the time to meet their children. I say at least 6 months, at least, to meet someone's children.

How many years should it take till u neet ur boyfriends other kid?

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