After the birth of my second child I developed postpartum depression. I found it quite difficult to cope with a baby and a 2 year old. I used to cry a lot and scream and shout. I was horrible. I used to scream in my childrens faces. I wouldn’t play with them as I was so sad. I felt very very sad and felt like everyone would be better off without me. I’m better now, I’m on medication and feel a lot happier. But I feel so guilty for my children. I know they won’t remember but I feel so bad for my second child. With my first it was lovely and exciting but with my second I felt so sad. I feel like a horrible mother. Will I always feel so guilty about this? My husband wants to have another child but the guilt makes me not want to. I don’t want to be like that again! But I also worry that if I don’t get postpartum depression after another child I’ll feel even more guilty for my second child 😩 I wish I never got sad and depressed. My husband always tells me I didn’t do anything wrong but I feel like I did! I wish I went to the doctor sooner but I was in denial x