I know I’m the one to blame in this so don’t bother telling me I’m the bad guy..

My sister says that it feels like I’m a stranger because I spend my time drawing and talking to my friends instead of spending time with her.

I invite her to sit in my room and play video games with me, I encourage her to talk to me if she has a problem, but she doesn’t.

She and I are 4 years apart. I’m 18 so I’ve been working towards being independent recently, and now the flood gates have opened. So I’m constantly being bombarded with this stuff now more than ever.

And my parents.. they continue to lecture me about how I’m not doing a good enough job at forging a relationship with my sister. Telling me she’s all I’ve got and saying I need to do better..

I just feel so torn up. Because they aren’t directly saying it, but they definitely are hinting at the fact they think I’m not a good big sister. But they never hear my side of things. They don’t know how much it hurts when she dusts in my bed and cries, telling me she wishes I would do more..

I’ve heard her crying herself to sleep three nights in a row, after telling me that she wants things to be how they were when we were little and played dolls.

I feel like I’ve won the award for shittiest eldest child in the world this year.