I basically already know the answer to this. But I’d still like some help for a man point of view and a woman point of view. I was in a long term, very toxic relationship with my daughters father for four years. Before that I dated a guy for four months and we split up. We got back into contact now that me and my daughters father is split. He absolutely despises my daughters father for what he’s done to me. The constant cheating, the abuse. He blames it on himself for leaving me.

Now we hang out, kind of friends with benefits wise a lot. My problem is he told me he’d never date me. I still have feelings for him and would be open to trying it again. Have discussed it twice but decided after the second time I wouldn’t even bring it up anymore. The last thing I need is to make him feel like he has to commit. I’m fine where we are now, for now. But I feel like in the future I’d want to date him.

He said if I didn’t have my daughter he would’ve dated me by now. He’s been single ever since he left me and has implied it’s because he never got over me. When we’re together he makes the first move to hold me, unconsciously rubs my hands, arm and back. Kisses my hair a lot and tells me how amazing and beautiful I am. Within the first two hours of hanging out at his place I went to put on something that he apparently loved and didn’t know I liked. He picked me up and hugged me saying this is why he loves me.

But he won’t commit. He says he doesn’t want to deal with the backlash from family and friends for dating someone with a child. But acts like he still cares. I’m so confused. Do I have a chance at all?