Anyone else wish they had a different man?

Im sick of mine. He is constantly a dick. Beyond mean. The stuff he says is like wow. The stuff he does I just want to kill him. Literally pray for a car crash. Hes been physically, emotionally, and mentally abusive. But he doesnt think so 🙄 or I did something to cause him to literally flip me over him and my neck snapped a good ten times. I wish there was a perfect guy. I dont ask for much. Love, respect, loyalty, honesty. If I wasnt pregnant I would leave right now tbh. Gets mad calls me names like fat ass. Funny because Im definetly not fat because at 20 weeks I barely look pregnant. Tries to make me jealous, we dont have sex maybe once a week, I dont really cum either, and my dumbass married this idiot. In a way I wish he would cheat so I can leave and find someone who loves me and doesnt hurt me on purpose. The only ppl im jealous of are the ones with good husbands. I keep praying it will get better but it doesnt. Also doesnt help Im horny as hell and just want him to go somewhere so I can have alone time. Hopefully one day Ill find the one but I dont ever see him turning into the one. If I listed everything he has done no one would understand why I stay. Even I dont. I hate pretending everything is okay when its not. Im not even comfortable talking to him. We barely talk bc all he does is bitch. Thanks for reading and sorry just needed to rant.