Long term relationship advice
My boyfriend and I have been together just shy of 14 years. We started dating in high school and are now 29 (me) and 30 (him). We’re both financially stable, I own the house we live in together and have openly discussed marriage for the past 6+ years realistically. Two years ago in February, we went ring shopping together and he bought a ring. When I’ve asked him about the prospect of marriage again he always says “don’t worry, I’m working on that.” He has also made comments without my prompting about getting married. I’m at a point where I just do not understand. Family and friends have turned the topic of our relationship into a joke. I do my best to keep a thick skin but after awhile, who wouldn’t be upset. I’ve discussed this with him too but he just brushes it off (he tends not to care what others think which I certainly envy). Last year at this time we had a serious conversation about moving our relationship forward and both agreed that it was the right thing to do. A few months ago, he said he wanted to propose before the end of the year.
I’ve been struggling with this mentally for quite some time. I go back and forth with being ok with status quo, feeling stuck/upset and eventually feeling like I’m “crazy” (for lack of a better term). Wash, rinse, repeat. I feel like a broken record when speaking with friends about how I feel and talking with him unfortunately hasn’t helped.
At this point, I have a lot of anger and resentment and I feel guilty for feeling that way. I’ve loved our life together but am feeling somewhat under appreciated and taken advantage of. My family is getting pretty vocal with their disapproval now as well which doesn’t help. They continually say “it’s time - what’s his deal.” I bought my house a few years ago and he moved in sort of gradually over time so we never really had “the talk” and doesn’t contribute to the bills. He does however help with other things (lawn care, snow removal, maintenance projects, etc) so it’s not fair to say he isn’t contributing at all.
I guess I’m here just looking to hear from others in similar situations. What did you do if anything? Are you happy how? Any advice?