TRIGGER: I just need to get this off my chest 😔

It's been weighing on my mind and heart so much for the past few months as my partner and I have been trying for over a year and 3 months ago lost our pregnancy at almost 9 weeks and I just don't know how to shake it... A while ago my sister in law came up to me and said 'you're going to be the first female that hasn't gotten pregnant before she's 20 in this family', I know she didn't mean it in a harmful way but it just really struck me deep and I didn't know what to do... no one knew but a few weeks before she said that my partner and I had a misscarige and when I was sixteen and had no body around for support and my ex ran off I was pregnant and lost the baby at 16 weeks I still think of my little boy every day and always imagine what he'd be like today so yes I may be 20 now with no children here with me but I have beautiful little angels up in heaven looking down on me.

With all of this going through my head and the struggles with TTC I've just hit a right rut and I just want to cry all the time.... is this normal to feel so sad? I'm just so lost at the moment. 😔