This is long, but please read bc I need help!

So I am 25w5d and 1/12/19 was my gender reveal party. We have had names for each gender picked out with input from friends and family since I was about 15w. We chose Addie Rayne for a girl, Addie was from 2 members of my maternal side. We chose Mack Allan for a boy, Mack is my paternal grandfather and Allan is my dad's middle name.

Days before the party, my mom had posted the names, so the guests would know ahead of time. When the names were released, my co-worker/friend's gf messaged me insinuating that I was naming my possible son after him. His name is Jeremy Alan Mack. He was the 3rd person I told about my pregnancy and I had been bouncing names off of him for the first 15w. He knew where the name came from and we laughed that it was crazy how many similarities our lives had to each other even though we had only known each other from this job and only for a year. His name had 2 of my family member's in it and he spent some time in the small town my mom was born and raised in. We joked about how we were clearly soul-besties.

When the gender was revealed as a boy, the gf told him and he messaged me asking if I was naming him after him and that he was uncomfortable with my name choice. We got into a huge argument as he claimed he had never heard my name choice before my mom posted it, then that he had forgotten and thought I was joking at the time, then that he was not okay with me using 2/3 of his name's because if he has a boy, he can't name it after himself because it won't be as meaningful. We went round and round as his gf and him insisted I change it. She is used to getting everything she wants.

Since then, I have seen a message between my hubby and his bff about how hurt he is that this will be his 3rd boy (2nd with me) and he hasn't named one. (Our 1st born was named after my deceased Uncle to honor him because we were close when I was little before he passed. Clearly I like meaningful/honoring names). His friend asked if he had talked to me about how he felt and he said no because he wants to give me everything I want to make me happy. I too want to give him everything I can that he wants to make him happy. Our mottto is "happy spouse, happy house".

The name he has his heart set on is Maximus Alexander. Now that there has been this HUGE name issue, I don't know how to announce the change without her feeling like she won, again....

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