I got pregnant young, about 2 weeks shy of my 18th birthday, which was back in September. Meanwhile my former best friend was being arrested for possession of methamphetamines. She has since gotten clean but is dating a 29 year old (she’s 16) who is in prison for stealing a car, using somebody else’s credit card, and being under the influence of meth. She had the nerve to act shocked when he was sentenced to 2 years🙄

We talk every once in a while, but it just doesn’t feel the same. She asks for details about my pregnancy, but I don’t feel like giving them to her. She shows so much enthusiasm in talking to me and wanting to call me and hear from me more, but I just don’t reciprocate those feelings.

We are not the same. Our days of smoking weed out of a pop can in my bedroom are over, and I think she still sees me as that person she used to know. Even though we’re roughly the same age, I feel so much older and matured. We are in different places in life, and we see things differently.

Yesterday she posted a picture of herself smoking a cigarette in the school bathroom with a caption that said “fuck school and fuck the rules I do whatever the fuck I want whenever the fuck I want” and I was astonished, mostly because I used to be just like her, and it really wasn’t very long ago. Motherhood really does change a person.

Tonight, she posted on her snapchat “hit me up if you wanna get high on whatever we can find”, and an hour earlier I had posted a picture of my daughter’s car seat and new clothes we bought today. When I compared our posts, this is when I realized that she is not the same person anymore and neither am I. And I never thought I would say this, but she’s not my best friend anymore, she is just someone I experienced my youth with. I’ve grown out of the things that she is still interested in, and that’s okay I guess, but it’s sad. My friendship with her was the basis of my childhood, I have no idea where it all went, life happens so fast.

Thanks for reading if you did, not sure what the point of this was, I just needed to get this out.