After having micro premature twin boys 1bls 10 oz and loosing one to NEC I was able to deliver a healthy full term baby boy 7lbs 7oz by the grace of God, (less than 1 year apart). This to me is miracle because I was dilated 1 cm after the cerclage removal for about 3 weeks and my doctor doubted I could even make it to my schedule c section. I thought this was going to be my happy delivery story at the hospital in the sense were I could hear my baby cry and then the staff would put my baby on my chest and we take pictures and videos. However, the epidural pokes failed anywhere from 10 to 20 times and left me defeated crying covered in boogers. I gave it my all with this pregnancy but in the end they had to knock me out using the gas and I missed the whole experience. It was weird I was feeling more pain on my back than on my c section incision (for days). I was so angry in pain because I never felt pain like this before. And the staff didn't care to explain much to me on what was going on. I prayed for days to let go of the anger and just be greatful and happy I delivered a healthy baby boy. In the end, I learned my pregnancies never go according to my plans but by God's. I humbled myself took a breath of fresh air and realized I am blessed and to be happy for the good I do have and my precious babies. (If anyone needs to talk or been in my shoes feel free to message me).