The past few weeks I started to spiral into another depression episode. I shaved my hair off, I’ve started throwing stuff away again and self harming. I don’t want to do anything horrible to myself but my boyfriend sits here and plays video games with his best friend every night after he works.

I’ve applied to over 30 fricken places and haven’t gotten a single call or anything. Im so desperate to get out of this house. I need to get out of my head. I can’t just be alone all day and night anymore. I’m going to do something horrible if this continues and he doesn’t even care. I tried talking to him but he never listens. He makes a promise to his stupid friend that they’ll play tomorrow but FUCK ME IF HE MAKES A PROMISE TO TALK TO ME, RIGHT? His friend is more important so fuck it. I can’t handle this shit. Im gonna try applying to a couple more places and hope I get something. If not I’m moving out and staying with my mother until something changes in my life. I’m sick of feeling alone and like I have nobody to talk to anymore