Hey ladies,

So this is my third pregnancy, I’ve miscarried twice before, once at 4w3d and again at 5w4d. I’m currently 9w1d, and not having any symptoms aside from constipation and a little fatigue. I’ve had two ultrasounds and have heard the heart beat, but whenever I go in for appointments, it’s hard for me to pay attention and face the fact that I’m actually pregnant. I’m so afraid to get attached and get my hopes up, in fear of losing this baby too. My husband is ecstatic, and so positive, but I really am struggling this time. I’m usually a really positive person, but I’m pretty sure I’ve got prenatal depression (is that even a thing?) and I want this baby SO so bad, but I’m SO so afraid of getting attached and losing this one too. It makes me feel like a horrible person and I’m afraid it’s going to make me a terrible mom for being so scared through this.

I have pregnancy tracking apps to try and encourage me and get me more involved, but the lack of symptoms and my past pregnancies have such a strong fear engrained in me, and I’m struggling emotionally with this.

Has anyone been through this before? Or have any advice? Maybe I’m just crazy.