Do you believe when someone is mad they really say things they didn’t mean ?

I think there is always a small grain of truth behind the insults. For example if someone said a woman was a "fat bitch" then I think deep down they have at least a very small issue with that person's weight. I think when you are angry you may say things you wouldn't normally say or severely exaggerate the issues but I feel like it comes from somewhere.

Yes and no. Before I went to therapy, my temper was super nasty and unproductive. I would say things I know would hurt the other person, just so I could prove a point to them. I rarely meant it and just said it because I knew it hurt or piss them off.

Whether they meant it or not, im not going to continue to talk to someone who had that much disrespect.

They’re * I’m correcting my spelling before someone comes for me lol 😂

In my opinion, the truth comes out when you’re drunk or angry. They meant it, they just didn’t have the guts to tell you until that moment.

I think when people are mad, they often say what they know will hurt the person good. Not necessarily what they think or feel. If you know something is an insecurity for someone, it’s an easy thing to insult them with. It’s obviously wrong, but in the heat of the moment, it can happen. However, you can also work very hard to work on not doing that. It’s something I struggle with but a working on.

On some level they must have thought of it before else it wouldn’t be in their mind.

I think people will say things they didn't mean to say in the way that they did, or that they only meant in the moment. The best example I can come up with is when I was 15 I had a ~wealthy~ boyfriend who was also super judgemental of other people's homes. My family was nowhere near wealthy and judging from the way he had reacted to some of my friend's homes, I was horrified at the idea of bringing him home to my parents, because I was horrified at the idea of my parents being treated the way he treated my friend's parents. (Pro tip #1 if someone shits on other people for having less money, or if you refuse to bring someone home out of fear of them mistreating your family, they're not worth your time) My mom and I got in an argument because she said she wouldn't continue allowing me to go over to his house after school if she didn't get to meet him. I, being an asshole teenager with too much anger for my own good, told my mom I was protecting her from being told her furniture and decorations were ugly. That's not exactly what I meant, but because I was mad I didn't take the time to think before speaking. That was one of the only fights my mom and I ever got in, and to this day I'm horrified at myself for saying it. I've apologized for it in the past, but every time I remember the story I have the urge to call her and apologize again.

I think sometimes when people say things out of anger they pick at an insecurity rather than saying something they really mean. I guess maybe some people mean it... 🤷🏻‍♀️ idk.

To a point. If it's a one off thing, yeah, I can buy it. If it's something said everytime a disagreement happens, then I believe the person means it. This is why I don't like drunkenness being used as an excuse to be an asshole.