With PPD and anxiety I barely go outside anymore. Today I was trying to feel good. My husband was supposed to take our son out to play but was too busy with work to bother. I decided to not be upset about it and take him outside myself. I put the baby to sleep soundly, hot my son all dressed, me all dressed. I saw our neighbors kids were outside playing and it made me nervous but I decided to go out anyway. I get out the door and my neighbors (who is also one of my husbands best friends) grandma is outside. Makes me nervous but I say hi. So I get a few steps and put my son down (he’s 17 months old). He’s excited so he takes two steps, trips over himself and falls, face down. In the mud. He’s not hurt but he’s shocked so he’s crying, I hear my neighbors grandma say “oh no!” My husband hears and pokes his head out. I say “he fell” Mu husband starts screaming at me in front of everyone, “WHAT THE FUCK. IS HE OK!? GO WASH HIM THE FUCK OFF!!” So I just went inside and cleaned him up, took his coat hat and boots off. We won’t be playing outside ever again lol. That’s why I don’t go out.