Was this wrong?

Question

Recently I’ve been thinking about my past. I’ve been in a relationship now for 2 years and I’m turning 20 soon, I’ve been thinking a lot about how when I was 16, I began seeing and dating a 27 year old man. I would secretly travel an hour to his house on weekends and stay the night and no one knew except a few close friends. My friends were concerned for my safety but I never was. I was impressionable and young and felt happy that an older very attractive man would want ME. however, recently I’ve been feeling sick even thinking about the whole situation. Even turning 20 I can’t even imagine being with someone who is still in high school. I can’t help but think of this man as evil now. What would a smart, well off man finished university, with a good career, want with a 16 year old who has no idea what she wants in life and in 2nd year of HIGHSCHOOL. I just want some reassurance, is what I’m feeling okay? Am I wrong for believing he is a bad person for what he did to me? Did he even do anything wrong because I did want it at the time?

Answer

That’s disgusting and in the eyes of the law, very wrong. But it depends on your state if it was actually illegal. Some states have the consent law at 16 but not sure if there are stipulations to age ranges. Overall, you did technically consent and willingly interact with him, though.

Answer

I think your feelings are valid. I would feel the same way.  You’ve grown up and realized that it’s not ok.  That why some women seem so harsh to younger girls on here because they are so young and impressionable.  I would talk to someone such as a therapist to help you more and see if you should do anything more.

Answer

You are so right...him dating you was so so beyond wrong is so many aspects. That being said don’t dwell on it. You were young and at that age it is hard to not fall for these older guys. I was there once too now I look back and I have no clue what he wanted with a very young girl who wasn’t ready for real life.

Answer

I didnt even read the description because if you're doubting something, you're probably right or else there would be no question about it. Does that make sense? I'm terrible with words... lol

Answer

That’s what these guys do, they prey off your naïveté, they take advantage of the fact that you are clearly needing:looking for some sort of validation for whatever reason. 
Most awful men, just tell you what they think you want to hear anyways. Men like the one you were with a predators and are skilled in knowing exactly what to say and how to make you feel good about what’s actually happening. 
They manipulate your emotions in order to gain access to what they need from you. 
You might have thought you were happy at the time, you might have thought you wanted it. Because he made you believe that in order to get what he wanted. 
You’re just now coming to terms with the fact that you were preyed on by a sexual predator. You are maturing and realizing what was actually wrong about the situation because you were too young/naive to see that before. 
I would think seriously about seeking therapy, this is a huge issue that leave lasting scars if you don’t get help for what you are currently experiencing.

Was this wrong?

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