I just want to talk about prenatal depression for anyone who wants to listen. My name is Liz, I’m 33, I have a successful professional career, a happy vibrant 1yr old girl, and I’m currently 16 weeks pregnant with a little boy. I am married to an amazing husband and I’m surrounded by people who love and support me, but most importantly, I am generally happy. However, during my previous and current pregnancy, I have considered ending my life.

During both pregnancies I’ve had hyperemesis and depression and have spent a lot of the time alternating between vomiting and crying. The minute those hormones flood my system I am overwhelmed with depression, anxiety and feelings of complete hopelessness. Everyday I have felt like I can’t do this, I can’t make it. How do I get out of bed? How do I get through till the end of the day. M

With my daughters pregnancy these feelings dissolved immediately the minute she was born, and I had felt amazing enough to go for round 2. And now they are back. And although I know there is an end to these feelings, and the vomiting (only 166 days to go!) I can’t see that light at the end of the tunnel right now. I don’t see any light.

My husband took this photo before he left for work a few weeks back. I am holding onto a bag of vomit. I feel like death. But I have to get up, and be mum, be present, function. Everyday I don’t know how to I’m suppose to do this, but I do somehow.

Before pregnancy I thought there was only such a thing as postnatal depression, but it is just as common for it to invade your life during pregnancy. It’s as common as one in five, but no one really talks about it. So I’m talking about it.

One thing I am good at is putting my hand up for help. I am now under the care of a perinatal mental health team. They make me fee safe. Remind me that I can do this. That it’s not forever. That one day I will feel better again. And if you feel this way too, you’re not alone, and help is out there. Start talking, it helps, I promise.