Yesterday was the death day of my first love yesterday made 3 years since he’s been gone .. I just miss him so much we were best friends since we were 11 years old my heart aches for him .. & at times I feel guilty for moving on .. about a year after he passed I started dating my current boyfriend & Now I’m 23 weeks pregnant . He’s very understanding of my feelings & the whole situation I had witnessed him get shot in the head & watched him die .. I feel bad talking about my first love to him I don’t want him to feel like he’s just a replacement .. My family used to make me feel bad by saying it was too soon for me to be in another relationship but his family has always been so supportive & welcoming towards my current boyfriend they adore him & always tell me how I deserve to be happy & that my first love would want me to be happy .. & I am soo happy & grateful to be with someone so understanding of my past but sometimes I have dreams of my first love & I just want him so much it hurts .. I am in therapy that has helped a lot but I had to skip my session yesterday & there has been a lot of emotions considering yesterday made 3 years . I just had to get this off my chest .. 💔