I’m a failure..

I dealt with extreme anxiety and depression after I was nearly raped and sexually assaulted at age 12. Since then school has been horrible and I eventually dropped out. Today is my best friends prom. I helped her pick out her dress and makeup. I’m truly happy for her but I wish she’d stop talking about it. It’s hard knowing I’ll never get to experience it as I’m getting my GED. I’ll never get that prom night photo shoot with the excitement that comes with it. The proud father at the end of the stairs as I walk down in a dress. I’ll never experience the look of pure happiness on my parents face at graduation. She invited me but I had declined. To her it probably felt as if I just didn’t want to go but I feel I don’t deserve it for dropping out. I wake up and stare at the ceiling, wondering if I’ll ever wake up from this nightmare.