Would you be annoyed?

Question

So my MIL has been purchasing baby items not on our registry, ok not a big deal. But I just found out she's buying items like baby clothes, baby bounce seat, and baby carrier off the Facebook marketplace and marking the items I picked out as purchased on my registry.  So there 2nd hand items she's found and saying they are "close enough". I feel really annoyed she wouldn't just buy something we actually want instead of finding free items off the internet that don't match anything and are for the wrong gender just because they are free or cheap. Is it wrong to feel this annoyed?

Answer

Not cool! I’m all about 2nd hand stuff but only when I pick it out on MY TERMS. Plus she’s keeping other people from purchasing items you really want by marking them purchased. That’s crap!

Answer

Can you unmark what she's marked? Anything that's fabric and can't be washed should not be bought secondhand, that's unsanitary.

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I would totally put it back on the registry and tell her that she can keep that at her house if she would like but you would like to see if others might want to purchase new for you guys!

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This would irritate me pretty bad. Not saying anything is wrong with second hand items..but, I just think that's weird of her. If she was trying to go that route, or saw cute stuff on the marketplace, she should've asked how you feel about it if she got these items for your baby first. My MIL is known for doing some shit like this, too. She bought the ugliest stroller from a garage sale to use for my oldest..kept it around for my youngest..& now she still thinks she can use a carseat that she used for my TEN year old..10yrs ago..for this new baby. 🙄

Answer

I'm having two showers. 1 with my in laws and 1 with my family and friends. I have two registries. Amazon and BuyBuyBaby. 3 things have been purchased. My husband's best friend came over last weekend and was telling him they've spent $400 on stuff for us, FIRST OFF, WHY!?!? Second, we have a registry and I know who has purchased those 3 things. Of all our friends and family, two people have used the registry while everyone else who has purchased things has ignored it. When I told a friend I had a registry she literally said, "Oh, I don't care about that." 
I literally, did NOT want one baby shower let alone two. I spent 3 hours walking through the damn store scanning crap for THEM. I don't mean to sound ungrateful but, why did I take the waste my time and effort making a registry for baby showers I didn't want if ya'll are going to ignore it. Not to mention I'm terrified to buy anything just based on things people tells us. 
I would feel exactly the same way you do if my MIL did the same thing. I have no idea what she's doing but if she DID do this, I'd certainly be upset.

Answer

I’d be annoyed. Tell her that’s stuff she needs to keep at her house.

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I agree with other commenters here. 
I myself have purchased second hand things off of fb marketplace, but it has been at my complete discretion. 
I would add anything she marked as purchased back to the registry for sure. If she says anything, explain to her that you registered for specific items for a reason (as most of us do) and she may do what she wishes with her purchases.

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I’m kind of the opposite with my mil. She is buying outrageously expensive things. She bought a $600 car seat that I can’t use til my girl can sit forward facing. It says on the box that it’s for all ages (newborns & up) but it weighs about 60 pounds and I don’t see how practical it would be for a newborn. Once it’s hooked up in the car your not supposed to take it back out. I literally haven’t gotten to pick out anything because she just orders stuff off of zulily, and yes I do have a registry that me and my husband add stuff to. But nothing has been purchased off of it, it’s mostly necessity items and a couple cute outfits. I didn’t even get to pick out my baby shower dress, she bought it without consulting me.

Answer

Nope I would be annoyed. My mother in law started buying a bunch of used stuff in the beginning to and my husband told her to stop and wait for the registery. We didnt want to hurt her feelings about the stuff she already got but we got rid of it without telling her... I dont wanna be stuck up about it but unless I know the person who I'm getting the used stuff from I dont want it.

Answer

Same boat here. Only they're not second-hand, just completely different from what we asked for. And then shes marking them as "purchased" on the registry. I'm trying to be appreciative but I put a lot of research into the items we chose, and I'm just nervous about using these products that I know nothing about. Not sure what to do about it. They're big ticket items such as carriers,  Pack n plays, etc....

Would you be annoyed?

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