MIL-how do you deal??

So, I really do love my MIL and never really had a problem with her until my son was born-well actually when I was pregnant. It started with me not eating certain things or drinking caffeine. She would make comments like “we would eat and drink whatever we wanted” or something similar. Then when he was born it was always about “just let him cry” or “we were never told this” or “my daughter didn’t have to do that”. The ones that hurt the most though were just recent. My mom got him a foam mat that’s in sections. Her comment was “oh those are such a pain! My daughter hated it for her son” right in front of my mom! My mom asked what I needed for the baby and I told her to get that for when we go outside. I’ll add that my husband and I grew up very differently in a financial aspect. So it hurt in that way too bc I know my mom works really hard for everything she buys. The icing on the cake was yesterday when my husband was using weed and seed while our son and dogs were outside. I said something to him about it and his mom said “well, he’s trying to kill the weeds!” I just picked up my son, got the dogs and went inside. I’m sorry that my son is more important to me than WEEDS!!! So if you read this far, thank you bc I needed to vent 😅 but my question is, how do I tell my husband how this is affecting me without him becoming defensive???