My father died when I was 14 and I was severely depressed. It was so bad that I would constantly have thoughts of suicide, cry myself to sleep almost on a daily, and stop everything that brought me joy because my father meant everything to me.

It wasn’t until my senior year that I finally agreed to get some help. Once I’ve found the right therapist and got my medication I started to enjoy life again. I would still have my sad moments, but I was healing and it felt so good to look forward to life itself. But, that all changed soon enough.

When I started my second semester at college my mom started to get sick again. She was dealing with a hyperactive thyroid and was put on kidney dyalisis since 2013. She got better around 2014 after my dad past, but she would go in and out of the hospital for a total of 6 moths. My depression came back worse than ever as I was watching my mom slip away from eyes. On June 2nd, I visited my mom at a nursing home and I saw her amputated legs for the fist time and I broke down in tears. I couldn’t handle that sight anymore and I told her under my breath “you don’t have to fight anymore mommy”. I kissed her goodbye and told her I loved her.

The next day she passed away and I wasn’t surprised to get the news. I cried and comforted my brother (he’s 13 now but. he was 7 when our dad passed), but after I cried I felt relief. Knowing that my mom is no longer in pain and is finally back with the love of her life again. I miss them both so much, but I think I’ve gotten stronger since that day and now I gotta live my and start new with my brother.