I’m 6 days postpartum, and im a mess. Aside from the long sleepless nights, and exhaustion from breastfeeding i am now newly single. My ex was by my side my whole pregnancy. Prior to me getting pregnant we had problems. He wasn’t growing up, he was smoking, drinking , partying and just acting like a little teenage boy with no responsibilities. The partying wasn’t constant granted and he’d let me know about it but the smoking and drinking was. It’d be to the point where he’d lie about it to my face and I’d find out from his friends that he’d go with them. Now let me add that we also have a toddler together which is why I was so upset about this. I was ready to leave when I found out I was pregnant again. He promised me he’d change and do his best for our kids. He even said he’d go to AA classes and parenting classes.

I thought he changed. Three weeks ago, I found pictures on his phone of him at the beach with some guy friends and a few girls I didn’t recognize. They were at a beach and they were smoking and drinking. This was when I thought he was at work. I kicked him out and told him he had until this baby was born to decide whether he was in or out. A week later he said he was in and told me he understood if I took a while to fully trust him again. The last two weeks of my pregnancy he was so nice. Offering me massages, helping around, and bringing me food. Well now like I said I’m 6 days postpartum and haven’t seen him since the day before I delivered. He had been arrested for guess what, drinking in public and causing a disturbance to the peace or whatever. When I delivered I called him once and when he didn’t answer I gave up.

Granted maybe I should’ve called him more but I was done . I let him know I had the baby and he was angry at me for missing it. I told him he was welcome in the babies life and he never responded . The next day he messaged me and asked if he could see the baby. He said he wanted me and wanted to be there for us. This was five days ago and I’m still waiting on him to show up. When I messaged him saying I wasn’t going to wait any longer he said he was waiting on me to tell him to come. Which is total bs because I made it clear he was welcome whenever. That’s when I knew he was just avoiding me.

After some snooping which I’m not proud of I found out he’s talking to another girl, asking her out, and basically already starting some sort of relationship with her. I confronted him about it and sent him a message saying “thanks for letting me know about her, and thanks for being a deadbeat. Have fun with your new girl and enjoy your single life I guess without us” all I got was a message saying “k. Bye”. He’s made it clear he won’t be in our lives anymore and I’m not sure what to do. Here I am with two kids trying to take care of them and adjust to having a newborn while he’s out living his newly single life with possibly someone else already. I feel so lost and broken and just pathetic. Idk how he could just move on from us so quickly.