I have nobody else to talk to about these things so I'm just going to vent. My DH & I have been together for roughly 9 years. We've been TTC for 9 months. Everyone around me is pregnant...makes me question God sometimes WHY not me? I thought we were doing it the "right way" we dated, got engaged, married, careers set, got a house etc. Meanwhile other people in not the best position in life get pregnant no problem by ppl they barely even know. I can't help but to feel hopeless & feel like God isn't listening to me sometimes.😭 Yes I know he knows the perfect timing but its hard to think of it that way all the time. Especially when you see your sis in law get pregnant by a guy she was just messing around with, considered abortion, & just flat out complained about her whole pregnancy...when other women like us would LOVE to experience such a thing. Then my cousin gets pregnant by her BF of 6 months. I just don't understand! If THEY can get pregnant why can't I??? I can't help but fall into depression over and over again & try to hide it daily. My DH doesn't understand. He asks me what's wrong but i don't wanna make him feel bad about it or make it feel like it's his fault. So i just keep to myself....break down crying in my car on my way home from work. Cry myself to sleep, cry in the shower etc. I'm just TIRED. I'm tired of feeling this way. I get to a point where I ask myself what my purpose is? I have no friends,I'm a terrible wife,& I can't even have children apparently. Sometimes i just rather stay asleep than wake up & deal with another day. I try to relax & let it happen but I cant. Its easier said than done....anyways..just needed to get this out. It's been built up for a while. Send me prayers, good vibes & advice on how to deal with this please. 💕