I just wanted to share my story. This is my first miscarriage. I apologize for it being so long.

Friday July 5th I went in to the the ER for bleeding and cramping. I should have been 9 weeks pregnant. After an ultrasound, we discovered I had what is called a Blighten Ovum, which means everything started to grow but something went wrong and the baby didn’t start growing but my body didn’t catch onto that right away.

Saturday the 6th was actually my wedding day. I chose to focus on marrying my amazing man and being happy for one day instead of sulking over not having a baby and canceling the wedding.

Sunday morning I woke up to blood. It wasn’t too heavy but I had cramping. I was in denial over it all and just kept changing my pads, kept wiping the blood off my thighs, never showing my new husband how bad it was. Until about 5 pm. I sat on the toilet and a huge clot came out. He walked into the bathroom and saw my thighs and my underwear and started panicking. He thought I was going to die. He took me to the ER again. By that point every time I stood I could feel it run out of me. When walking from the waiting room to our room in the er he walked behind me so no one saw my blood soaked pants. Here’s where I finally started freaking out- the nurse gave me a gown to put on. When I took my pants off and stood up, blood started running down my legs. I sat down and started hyperventilating. My husband grabbed my hand and helped me breathe, saying it’s okay it’s okay. He hit my call button for a nurse to come help. She assisted me in getting my gown on while my husband wiped the blood off the floor. She helped me lie down and then wiped my legs off with a wet rag. After my pelvic exam, they confirmed I was having a miscarriage. Even though I knew it was coming and that I had known since Friday that there wasn’t a baby, when I heard miscarriage I broke down. I kept telling my husband that I was so sorry, even though I knew it wasn’t my fault. And he stayed to strong. He held my hand through it all. The nurses gave me wipes and mesh underwear and a pad to change into. As soon as they left the room, my husband was up and grabbing the wipes. Now he isn’t a fan of blood at all but he started wiping off my thighs and my butt without hesitation. We then prayed together. We came to the conclusion that this was our first test as a married couple. Yes it’s been hard and unfair but we believe everything happens for a reason and it wasn’t in Gods plan for us to have a baby. I’m just so thankful to be alive and to have such an amazing husband. ❤️