Doubts about faith/different from other Christians

So for a few weeks I’ve been questioning my faith. I just feel extremely different from most Christians I meet. Cause most like worship music, are more conservative, attend Bible studies, and just seem more religious. I on the other hand am this crazy bipolar artsy musician, who is a little more on the liberal side of things, but not completely liberal, only listens to depressing alternative music and just seems like an outsider. I’m naturally a perfectionist and I feel that’s starting to come into my faith. I went to a very legalistic Christian private school that scarred me and my parents are much more conservative. With my faith I usually read a few bible verses a day, feel God’s presence in nature and practice meditation and prayer before bed. I also feel slightly guilty for not seeing a Christian therapist even though it’s been massively helpful and has even grown my faith and selflessness. I’m trying to reassure myself that everyone’s different even in the church and we all have our own way of worshiping God and our own perspectives but I just keep stumbling on these condemning thoughts.