After three years, of being controlled and manipulated, mentally and emotionally sometimes physically abused, I finally got the strength and courage to leave and take my kids with me. I'm a nervous wreck but Im a nurse and can get a job everywhere. I cant handle the hatefulness and spitefulness, and lack of respect. I fell out of love a long time ago but I tried to reignite the fire, tried therapy, tried books. It just never got better. I can finally join a gym, shower alone, shave my legs, listen to rap music, watch fifty shades of grey, Riverdale, GOT, and finally gawk at Jason mamoas hot ass body in Aquaman without feeling guilty. I'm allowed to have social media, and finally reconnect with the world and it feels so damn good.

UPDATE #1:

It's been six days since I left and I have almost gotten completely moved out and have moved to Tampa with my mom until I get a nursing job here and get my own apartment. (Will take a month or two, Tampa is expensive). It's going to be hard because I don't know anyone but I'm excited to start this new adventure with my kids and I've started losing weight! But anyways, I went to pick up my kids yesterday and he couldn't have made it anymore difficult. He refused to talk to me about time sharing, wouldn't confirm whether he would be at the next exchange to have them for the weekend which is August 2-4th at 7pm. We meet half way from Ocala to Tampa which is only like a 45 min drive. And he just refuses to talk about it and I'm like okay well either be there or may God be with you because your kids need you and there ain't no wrath like the wrath of a mother. I'm just so frustrated because he pushes me to get irritated and then calls me a cunt three times while I'm there and tells me all I'm going to do is whore around in Tampa. I just got really overwhelmed because I know I'm doing the right thing but doesn't make it any easier.