How am I feeling? I feel so broken hearted. Why did you have to go? Mom and Dad were so excited to meet you. From the moment I read that word and saw those two lines, I knew you would be a part of our forever. My first would be a big brother, my home would be full. My heart would rejoice in my two little ones! I held your big brother and rubbed my belly with a smile on my face every night...

Then yesterday, I was worried. I was bleeding.

Surely not my period, I'm 6 weeks by now.

No. Worse.

My biggest fear confirmed.

I was so worried about you. I didn't want you to go! I wanted this so bad! I wanted YOU!

The Dr. came in...

He had bad news. My hCG levels are very low, no baby and no heartbeat was detected. I'm passing more blood and fluid now. Just like that...you left me.

You left without a goodbye. Without me ever seeing your picture or face. Without me ever holding you. I loved you! I grew you for a little while and you were real. You made me so happy while you were inside, and I'm so blessed to have that memory every day. I'm so sorry this happened my baby. I will see you again one day. I will grieve, I will cry, I will pray. I will think of you always when I have another. I will always be your mom.

To all women struggling with miscarriage or infertility, I am with you. I have felt your pain and heartache. I pray for us all. Baby dust to all. Healthy pregnancies to all. ❤