TMI !!!! Suicidal thoughts.

I’m a stay at home mom. I deal with really bad depression and my fiancé has told me a few times before “just stop feeling that that” when I vent to him about feeling really depressed. I have told him several times it’s not something you can just turn on and off and that if I had a choice I wouldn’t choose to spend my life sitting here wanting to kill my self all day. Well for the past year my memory has been slipping. Recently it’s gotten so bad to the point where I can’t remember the day prior or I will forget what I was doing as I get up to do it. I was telling my fiancé how I feel like I’m losing my mind and his response was

“Don’t feel like that” or “just remember stuff ”

I immediately snapped at him telling him that I have told him before that things aren’t that simple. Now he claims that he was just trying to give encouraging words. I’m so annoyed with him. I literally go through every day fighting the urge to kill myself and his response is “just stop feeling like that”