okay let me just start like this i knew this guy when i was like around 5 . He was my moms bf , friend .. then after my mom and her bf broke up years later on ,the friend and my mom started dating .. okay well a little after they started dating my dad died . im like 12 or 13 at the time . i fell in really bad depressed tried killing myself . took drugs to make me sleep cause i dont want live my life and i couldnt kill my self . i lost my father & and my mom ( my mom is alive just up her bf ass ) . idk how to feel . Like i want her to be happy and with someone but me and this man never get along . We definitely cant live together we have gotten in 2 fights . my mom loves him , but my depressed got way better like 1 year ago . and honestly its getting bad again . Ive pushed aside the feeling of me not having a mom even tho we sleep under the same roof and talk everyday . i feel like she puts him over me i feel like she loves him more . And i feel bad because they argue and they argued tn because i watch their 2 year old everyday and he wanted to bring at 9 am and it was just better for me to have him tn and wake up with him tm instead of me having to meet with her bf and just waking up . like it use to be bad between me and him but afyer we stopped living together ive been able to turn my cheek and just be nice and say hi . but all i wanted was for it to be easier on me and logan . well Idk what to do . I want an outside opinion. I feel dumb and stupid for feeling this way but then again it hurts . it hurts to not have no body. it hurts to look for someone and try to find that love in a guy and continually get fu ked over but still do it cause you judt aant someone there for you . IDK WHAT TO SAY ANYMORE .