Ok so I just had our second baby 4 months ago I’m dealing with some pretty bad postpartum and severe body issues and suicidal thoughts. Me and my husband just keep having the same fight and I need some help. Things were weird between us and I made the mistake a few months ago and went through his phone. I saw convos with his friends where they’re sending naked pics of women porns videos etc back and forth. I’ve posted about this before but he rides ATVs with his friends and they spend the weekends out. His one friend was talking about how it would be awkward if they all stay together if he “pulls a chick” he’s married btw and my husband said he would watch but wouldn’t join because he’s married. I asked him about this and he said they were just kidding and being guys. Whatever. I don’t like porn I know some people are cool with it but it’s just not my thing. So last month I used his phone to look something up and it pulls up the porn video he had been watching. It’s POV porn and he searched specifically teen porn(like 18-19 year old) Like I said I have body issues right now and lost it. We had been having sex everyday and he was still watching porn. I felt like he’s not attracted to me because I will never look like that girl and feel like I will never be good enough for him. We had a huge fight and he said he wouldn’t do it anymore. Fast forward to last night he took some pics of me and the kids I asked for the pics and he told me to get his phone and send them to myself. I pull up his camera roll and he has screenshots of Instagram models in bikinis that barely cover anything. I asked him about it and he said he sent it to his friends and that it’s just a guy thing. I feel like crap again because once again I feel like I can’t compare to these other women and if he thinks they’re hot I must look like so disgusting to him. So my question is is his convos with his friends sending porn videos naked/semi naked pics of women to each other “normal guy” stuff or is he being disrespectful to me?